Buying a house is hard. It is frustrating. It is time consuming. It is failure after failure after "ooh is that a nice one" nope, failure. And then there's the *one* that you know you love, but the foundation has multiple cracks that have gone through the middle of the stones...not cement blocks, and not around the mortar joints like brick walls...but right through the middle of the stone.
It's even harder to buy one with someone else. Or at least that is the conclusion I have come to at the end of this fourth week of "temporary living". It's been 8 weeks since the initial "Hey I got a job, should I take it? Okay we're gonna move soon" conversation.
We have spent numerous hours googling, zillowing, truliaing, etc homes in our "30 minutes of driving from his work" radius. We have had 3 realtors at two agencies take us through approximately 40-45 homes. We have looked at just under 10 "for sale by owner" homes on our own. Bringing our current grand total to X number of computer hours, 3 full days, and 50 houses.
I'm done. It's not that I'm tired, or I'm cranky, or I'm confused. Nope. I'm done. Period. End of thought. Fully formulated opinion. I'm done. I don't want to walk through another home. At all. I don't care if it is the most "beautiful, perfect, completely updated, only $60,000" home. My brain can no longer distinguish wonderful from awful.
I'm tired of discussing the pros/cons of each home. I'm tired of thinking "oooo maybe this will be it" and thinking about what colors I would paint what walls.
We had our second walk through of the house I "previewed" you bloggy readers with last week. The wiring is old. The plaster walls covering the upstairs hall and stairwell are pretty impossible to tear out and replace....leaving us with terribly dark red walls and awful texture. The smaller bedroom we noticed isn't drywall, but apparently the type of walling they put up in trailers. It has a thin thin piece of covering that has a light texture on it...again it would need to be fully ripped out to avoid the texture....and the few holes are impossible to patch.
I'm not sure where we stand or what we are actually going to do. Maybe make a real low offer? Then we'd have some money to rip all this silly stuff out and pay someone to rewire the upstairs. Maybe try to find a different house?
Maybe live in the tiny one room motel/temporary nut hut forever?
I can think of two people who (may/may not be readers of this) who would probably be upset that this is my attitude about it. So for them, just in case, I'll list the things I am thankful for....
I'm thankful that we are not in a situation where we have to sell our little nut hut right away.
I'm thankful that husband man has a job and has already put in 4 successful weeks there.
I'm thankful that we have a realtor who is willing to drive, walk through, repeat, and have us come to a "uh we're not sure" conclusion....over and over again.
I'm thankful that we have a "temporary home" that doesn't leak when it rains, has a shower to get clean in, and is allowing us to keep our puppy with us.
I'm thankful that we have met another couple and seem to be becoming good friends. It's nice to have someone to do things with.
I'm thankful my parents left us borrow the college fridge so we didn't have to buy a small one.
I'm thankful that we have both cars here so I can walk the pup in the morning and still come down to the library to use the free wi-fi while she sleeps.
I'm thankful that WalMart is close enough we can go every other day and buy food since our fridge is small :)
I'm thankful that our pup has been quiet and non-barking almost all the time. I can't wait until we can get her a yard so she can just run like crazy.
I'm thankful that we do not have any children that we are pulling through this mess. Hopefully we'll find the future ones a nice house and have it all updated and pretty before they arrive. And hopefully they'll have a yard to run like crazy in too :)
I started to read through the book of Hebrews today. I made it through chapter 7 and then my tummy growled and I stopped for food. Prior to my selfish food break I realized a few things....I know what is coming in the future chapters of this book....a list of people who were faithful and hopeful yet never received what was promised to them....but they didn't doubt their God.
I struggle most days with truly believing He has a reason for me being here. Probably because I don't know what it is yet. Probably because we keep striking out on houses and I feel like we're never going to find one. I thought for sure that if he was moving us at this time there'd be a classroom in need of a passionate teacher. But all I'm hearing is "you have to be willing to give up everything and follow God's will".....I don't know that I'm willing to give up my desire to be a teacher. What if that isn't what He wants? What if that's not in my story? What if .......
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